Archive for April, 2007

Selfless deed anyone?

“Believing or teaching that the chief motives of human action are derived from love of self.”

Are you thinking of what this defines ? No i am not one of those quiz masters or anyone who wants to play guessing games with you. “Still not figured it out? Ahh!! okay here s another clue…” none of those things. Frankly i find it really insulting. Well they know you don’t know and still go on asking you to figure it out. Why should my ignorance feed another person’s ego huh!!! Okay i guess i have evaded the definition for 4 lines so much for i- am- no- quiz master. The sentence above defines SELFISH.

Honestly did you think that this idea was bad until you came to know that this was the meaning of selfish? Did your face make all geometrical angles and did you go all like ” good heavens , that is so bad” when u read that sentence?If you did not then the reason I reckon is because its true.If you are asking ” Are u suggesting miss that we are selfish?” then again “yes, I am.”. The degree of right and wrong of any idea to a great extent belongs to the self.But you never really know what the person is thinking ,primarily because he is afraid of what the world might think of him. This is perfectly true in all of us. You don’t want to look like the only geek who believes in some theory which the entire world thinks is hideous.

Why is it so? Why are we all selfish? There is really no explanation for why it is ,cause it is inane. Can we point out one action of us that is not derived from the love of self? Everything you do has you involved in it . You have a role to play in the result. You are a variable in the equation whether you like it or not.Every selfless deed we think we are doing is in fact in a small way selfish.We want to make a difference. WE want to break away from the shackles of mundane life where we are of no help to anybody. WE want to bring a smile to people’s lives. WE want to contribute a little something that we can to the rest of the world. That is laudable but is not quite selfless. The reason being at the end of the day it makes you happy. You decide to do something that will help YOU get out of a certain kind of lifestyle and help you get some peace. Now why is this wrong?? It is not. Simply because it is derived form the love of self? So what of it did? You did end up bringing a smile to other people’s lives. You did try and make lives of not so privileged people better.

We might argue that deeds by our national and international heroes are selfless? But is it really? When Mahatma Gandhi decided to wear just a dhoti because he could not see his countrymen in poverty , he did something he believed in. It coincided with his thoughts and beliefs.
Being Selfless does not have to be the virtue or the reason why people like him are great souls. It is because of their principles and the fact that they were courageous enough to go to any extents to do what they believed in.That makes them great.

So what is being selfish then? Where do you demarcate the line where it falls in to being downright horrible? I think that is where you are living in self concocted world thinking every action even if it does not benefit you should not benefit anyone else more than you. That is selfish in a bad connotation or lets say in the real sense of the word that we believe in. So that’s more of what you don’t want others to have than what you want for yourself. This contradicts what we think being selfish is all about and in a weird way says that anything that is really not good for you is maybe not good at all.

Many times we ask ourselves are we being too self centered? And sometimes the answer might be a YES.This yes does not have to mean we are some kind of a monster who is overflowing with ego. It just means we are normal. As long as our sole objective in life is to be happy i don’t think there is anything wrong in being selfish .It is only going to take us a step forward in our journey towards happiness. By being selfish , by wanting things that make you feel happy in a wholesome way, a way that does not involve tripping the other person from the race, a way that makes you feel happy when you go to sleep every night, a way that makes you remember the face of the kid with whom you spent the day in the orphanage and realise that you just tasted heaven.If that action was derived from love of self, is it really so bad?

So selfless deed anyone??

Mortal Kombat!!!!

That’s it . It was going to be over. These were my last few moments. My tension knew no bounds. It was so high up that Mount Everest seemed like an ant.This was THE END. I knew it like you know when India is going to lose a match. It is like God is looking down at you, smiling, more of a smirk I would call it and telling you , “That’s it my boy, your pretty much useless existence ends here, you better come up”. I mean whats with that huh. Useless Existence. Well I couldn’t really contradict him for 2 reasons
1. He is God( come on the man is omniscient I wouldn’t want to mess with him)
2. There wasn’t much I could really contradict about. The premise seemed pretty true.
The guy had a point you know.It all came down to these few moments. If I could finish this task before the time ran out I could survive. It was a question of life and death.

Okay don’t panic , I told myself. Not panic, mother of sweet god, how was I supposed to do that.Did anyone realise how important this was? Okay one pointer no one ever realises how important something is for YOU.You do it yourself actually.There was no way I am getting out alive if I screw this up. The clock was ticking,tick tock tick tock tick tock, okay calm down,everyone knows how a clock ticks, you really dont have to explain that. Its unbelievable how stupid your brain thinks when you are caught in a quagmire of a situation. Okay, agreed ,I am no Einstein reincarnated but what’s with all the doltish brainwaves you get when you are having a near death experince.I actually remembered the verse of the song I had been brooding over for the past 2 days at this moment. “This”, I tell my brain “This you can come up with , but you cant think of a way to solve the problem at hand”. Really I am some creation .No wonder the almighty wants me up there so soon. Useless Existence. That really does haunt me. Never knew i was quite the sensitive kind.Ah!! the lessons life teaches you about yourself!!!

But do I let these hurdles prevent me from thwarting the impending disaster. No I went on and on determined to do everything I could to finish the task at hand, determined to escape the clutches of the really ugly end that was staring at me.Believe me it was ugly.I could see it in my head. I gave it my best shot, I am quite sure that i defied all laws of physics, I wrote faster than light travelled.Don’t believe me?? How else do you think i finished my last essay question of my board exam in 2 mins. Yeah!!! you heard me, 2 minutes,120 seconds.The time difference between my last full stop and the pretty invigilator’s hand snatching away my paper was near zero. My life was saved.I could have danced with the invilgilator a la aamir khan. I was ecstatic. Over the moon you could call it. I could see God looking down and smiling ,no not a smirk it was definitely a smile and it was like he told me
” Don’t be so happy, you have 5 more papers to go!!!! “

Door Of Disorder

She was sitting there contemplating what to do. There it was staring at her and she had to do something about it. It cant be just there in the way that it was. Something had to be done and no one else was going to do it. They had all established it.When it came to all the dirty work they just assumed she would do it.Oh well she could not blame them really, she did do them.

She was crossing her fingers and was preparing for the inevitable.What was she waiting for? A miracle? For someone to walk through the door and help her . Yeah right like that was going to happen.The chances of that happening was as small as bush having a brain . Its amazing how you know when the probability of something happening is an absolute zero but still your heart keeps expecting that to happen. She kept looking at the door to see if someone would come. All these sales people can never disturb you at a time you want to be disturbed.Only when u are catching your beauty sleep or watching an interesting show in TV would your calling bell howl and your telephone will fulfill its part. She would not even mind the people from the banks who massacre her name and literally beg her to take a credit card or a personal loan.It quite amused her as to how these people were hell bent on drowning her in debt.But even putting up with these things seemed like heaven when compared to the herculean task ahead of her.

Why god ?Why ? Why me ?Why this work? She could do anything else but this.The very thought of having to do this again in just a week was overwhelming for her. And she postponed it to such an extent that the work was now humungous .Who ever said “Although prepared for martyrdom, I preferred that it be postponed.” must have been in her position when they said it.Okay she told her. The time had come. She had to do it. She just had to get it done with it.She had to win over it again. Will this be the last time? Well she desperately hoped so. Here comes the moment of truth.

“Oh stop being such a chicken open the door”, she told herself.With a huge sigh and great fear she opened the door of her daughter’s wardrobe . Out fell all the clothes almost drowning her with the sheer volume. Yeah her biggest and scariest nightmare was true now. She had to arrange them neatly again only for it to go back to the same disarray within a week. So there she was trying to comprehend the magnitude of the disaster and working out a strategy to put it in order .First she had to disentangle her legs from the various clothing materials and avoid hurting herself.She was convinced rocket science was an easier job.Whilst she was doing it , the phone rang. Her heart skipped a beat. She answered the phone “Madam i am calling from ‘always-calling-people-and-disturbing -them-to-get-a-loan- bank, are you interested in a personal loan?”
hmmm… can you explain the plan in detail ” She said not believing her stroke of good luck.
Then went the calling bell. She answered it only to find that her daughter was back home.This is what she called double treat .She dint say a word and went back to the telephone, finished a long conversation finally ending it with “what?????? you need an income proof , sorry I am a house wife” .She loved to hear their shocked reactions.She slowly went to her daughter’s room.


And there she saw her daughter sitting there contemplating what to do. She was crossing her fingers and was preparing for the inevitable.
Ahh Praise the Lord“, She told her self and went on with her chores.Now what was that show she wanted to see today…..